I Was Scared to Admit I was Weaning

I’m a blogger. I talk about my life, my kids, chat to so many people and engage over social media. I share my children’s milestones, their fun stories…pretty much everything. Sharing is pretty much part and parcel of blogging.

But I was scared to talk about weaning.

To be precise I’ve been fearful of admitting we are weaning Piglet before 6 months and this in itself is ridiculous but true.

Why?

Judgement.

picture of baby weaning

This has probably stemmed from when I wrote a post about the end of breastfeeding journey with the gremlin and was tweeted by someone informing me I should not be weaning before 6 months; exclusive breastfeeding was advised. This person refused to see my point of view and rationale, even though I explained I had sought advise from a paediatric dietitian before commencing weaning. This quite frankly, really annoyed me. This person was so black and white.

It’s true the NHS and Department of Health both advise weaning should begin around 6 months. The British Dietetic Association however, advise not before 4 months and not after 6 months. Both my girls have been around the 5 month mark and started on baby rice and fruit and vegetable purées.

This isn’t a post debating when you should wean at all but guidelines are just that – guidelines! You may want to start before if your baby is showing signs of being ready. What happens when they hit exactly 6 months? A switch goes off in their gut?? Breast milk will give your baby what they need up to 6 months but with little Piglet staring at me with her mouth open when I ate and trying to grab all my food, I think she was ready! Both my girlies were ready and as I am giving Piglet purées at the moment; they both devoured the lot with no issues.

A blogging bud of mine was recently chastised for putting a pudding recipe in a weaning group as apparently it is wrong to offer your baby a pudding? Don’t get me started on that one. She wanted to share her recipe, which was completely healthy but was met with criticism. I can understand varying opinions but not publically trying to shame another mother for hers. It is really easy to do this hidden away, sat behind a phone or computer.

Why should I care about what people think and even more so, why should people think it’s ok to judge and tell me what is right with my children? Despite trying to shove those thoughts to the back of my mind, I did care and quite frankly did not like the fact that I did.  That almost felt like a weakness.

We unfortunately live in a trolling world and I guess people will say, if you are going to share be prepared to have some come back now and then. But this sucks! It really does.

There are plenty of things I will not write about on my blog (I would love to) but the fear of the judgement overwhelms me a little too much. It’s much easier to be non controversial and have a quiet life and blog. I should be able to shout out to the world that my little bean is eating and enjoying her food (and I guess I have now) but I didn’t.

Sometimes this is what is wrong with blogging and social media and I don’t like it at all.

My Petit Canard

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36 Comments

  1. March 13, 2017 / 7:51 am

    Well done you for sharing this hon, many of us wean before 6 months and the current advice is just that, advice, it will probably change again in a few years. I hate that side of blogging too and though I have shared some controversial stuff I generally try and keep my stronger opinions to myself as don’t want to bring on the judgement! Great post hon xx
    Caroline (Becoming a SAHM) recently posted…Siblings March 2017My Profile

  2. March 13, 2017 / 8:19 am

    Great post lovely! I’ve pretty much waited until 6 months as we are doing BLW but I’ve tried him with porridge and pouches and he just wasn’t bothered! Thus I too started earlier but it didn’t work out. He turns 6 months this weds (aaaaargh!!) So I’ll be starting properly and I have no idea how it’ll be going. I think you’ll find that most people start weaning early now. No judgement here:)

  3. March 13, 2017 / 9:58 am

    Of course you are right. There seems to be a green light that if someone posts anything on social media it means everyone can comment and pass judgement. When let’s be honest all we should be doing is screen grabbing and sending it to your fellow judgey Whatapp friend, haha! But seriously, sometimes we need to just be left to make our own decisions on our children. I guess it’s tricky with blogging because you have to put some stuff out there to create a blog that people do want to read. Keep it up, you’re doing great x

  4. March 13, 2017 / 11:47 am

    I think it is really hard when guidelines change all the time, but I read some pretty scary stuff when I was looking at weaning Alfie about early weaning, so I was frightened into waiting! But now I’m a bit more confident, I think it’s easier to see what is absolute medical advice you should follow and what is “research” that shows a different side but shouldn’t be taken as gospel! It’s so horrible that you felt like you couldn’t share because of fear of being judged, but I’m glad you did share this 🙂 #MarvMondays
    Abi – Something About Baby recently posted…Easter Egg Hunts in Essex 2017My Profile

  5. March 13, 2017 / 12:56 pm

    I weaned my first well before 6 months because she was ready, my second however wasn’t ready until around the 6 month month mark. All babies are different and we do what is right for them! #marvmondays
    The Tale of Mummyhood recently posted…Spring Garden InspirationMy Profile

  6. March 13, 2017 / 4:12 pm

    Definitely just do what is right for you and piglet. Sod everyone else and their guidelines!! Thanks for joining us for #marvmondays xx
    Fran Back With A Bump recently posted…Marvellous Mondays!My Profile

  7. March 13, 2017 / 4:44 pm

    I think it’s so sad that you were nervous to share this because of other people’s judgement. I weaned both mine at 4-5 months, they were ready. That’ should be all the justification anyone needs to hear. I think it’s great that you’ve decided to share this, and sod anyone’s judgement! #MarvMondays

  8. March 13, 2017 / 6:54 pm

    Good on you for sharing….
    When my teen was a baby the guideline was 4 months and before then it was 3 months….
    It’s nobody’s business but your own how you feed your own baby x
    Kim Carberry recently posted…Our Weekly Meal Plan!! – #mealplanningmondayMy Profile

  9. March 13, 2017 / 7:16 pm

    I know the feeling. I started weaning my daughter at 5 months and feared what judgement I’d receive from blogging about it. I live in Denmark, the guideline here to start weaning is 4-6 months. I had the support of my health visitor, so got started on purees. Now I wish I wasn’t so worried about it. I know I did the best for my daughter. You’ve done the best for your children too!

  10. March 13, 2017 / 7:22 pm

    It is such a shame you felt like you couldn’t share the start of this exciting part of Piglets development due to fear of judgement. I think we should all just let each other get on with our own parenting, I mean dies really make a difference to anyone else’s life at what age you decide to wean? Alex is 4 and a half months and is already trying to steal my food all the time..I doubt we will make it to 6 months either xx #marvmondays
    Wendy recently posted…#BlogCrush linky – Week 4My Profile

    • March 18, 2017 / 7:32 am

      Back again from #BlogCrush.. you have been linked up as someone’s favourite post from the week, congrats!xx
      Wendy recently posted…#BlogCrush linky – Week 5My Profile

  11. March 13, 2017 / 9:23 pm

    Oh god I hate the judgey judgey parents. It’s such an individual choice and who should decided…..the parents. Fab post. Popping over from #marvmondays
    helen gandy recently posted…Smoke and Fire.My Profile

  12. March 13, 2017 / 9:42 pm

    Well done for sharing this lovely! So honest. I can totally relate.
    I have only mentioned weaning a few times on my blog. I’ve only mentioned that I’ve weaned Freddie at 4 months, twice on my blog. I was scared of judgement – but I shouldn’t be! I’ve done it with all three and they’re all happy and healthy.
    Social media is such a dangerous place.
    #MarvMondays
    Life as Mum recently posted…Our Stay at Bluestone, WalesMy Profile

  13. March 13, 2017 / 9:58 pm

    Hey lovely, I completely get where you are coming from on this. I have to admit there have been some things I have held back on sharing for fear of judgement. Weaning hasnt been one of those things, but there definitely have been other things. I started weaning both of our little ones just before they hit the 6 month mark and completely agree with you that you as parents know when your baby is ready for food, and from the pictures it looks like little piglet loves it 🙂 Glad you felt ready to share this milestone with us on #MarvMondays. Emily x

  14. March 14, 2017 / 4:54 pm

    I don’t blame you for being cautious even though it’s crazy you need to be. I got comments at a weaning workshop I went to because I had started giving my daughter puree at 5.5 months. It was ridiculous and unnecessary. I was told I could over feed her. As if 2 weeks would make a difference and I was ramming food into her face. She had dropped weight percentiles for the first time since she was born too so I was so sure she needed the food. That and she oggled everything I are!

    So thanks for sharing this and doing what was right for your children. Not that I should even have an opinion on it because it’s your life, but I would have done exactly the same in your position. Every baby is different and you’re spot on that it’s not like there is a ‘weaning on’ button that’s hit at 6 months to the day. It’s all so dull that people feel the need to pass comment on people doing a great job just because it doesn’t confirm to some guidelines on a bit of paper… #MarvMondays
    Angela Watling recently posted…The chicken pox diaries, part IMy Profile

  15. Nige
    March 15, 2017 / 7:40 am

    Well done for sharing sarah we weaned the girls before 6 months every baby is different that’s my belief great post thanks for hosting #bestandworst

  16. March 15, 2017 / 8:36 am

    Guidelines change all the time. As mum’s we know what’s best. I weaned L at around 5 months, like your two he needed it! Some people are just idiots, I got told I was a dreadful mother for letting L help me wash the car the other day, honestly, what nonsense! #bestandworst
    Briony recently posted…Feeling Calm #54My Profile

  17. March 15, 2017 / 9:04 am

    People get on my (lack of) tits. Every family is different. Why is it right for someone to chastise another for their decisions? #bestandworst
    Rach recently posted…Night Time NostalgiaMy Profile

  18. March 15, 2017 / 10:51 am

    Guidelines and advice change all the time. And you’re right, they’re just guidelines not the law. As long as everyone is happy, healthy and loved, who cares how you get there?! It’s really no one else’s business. Some people have way too much time on their hands! #bestandworst
    Tubbs recently posted…Turn on the Light. Random Acts of KindnessMy Profile

  19. March 15, 2017 / 2:06 pm

    Aww there is so much judgement from so many mothers. Breastfeeding is such a touchy subject. I am a breastfeeding advocate, but I don’t believe in shaming mothers. If you’re feeding your child, you’re doing your job! No one way is the only way. Your baby is beautiful!

  20. March 15, 2017 / 4:09 pm

    Well done for highlighting this. I held off weaning my firstborn but then he stopped gaining weight until I weaned and the HVs told me I should have done it sooner! gggggrrrrrrr! #bestandworst

  21. March 15, 2017 / 5:59 pm

    I know what you mean. My little one is a week shy of 6 months now, but I started weaning her early last week as she has been showing all the signs of being ready for a while. As you said, they are just guidelines and as mothers I believe we should trust our instincts. I also haven’t posted about it yet for fear of judgement. #BestandWorst
    Laura – Autumn’s Mummy recently posted…The 90s tag – my life as a 90s kid!My Profile

  22. March 16, 2017 / 4:11 am

    We started weaning just after 4 months on the advice of our doctor. The reason why you should introduce solid foods no later than 6 months is because breast milk has no iron in it. Babies are born with a 6 month supply of iron. After that they need to get it from food. However, there is no real reason why waiting until that 6 month mark would be necessary. I actually feel that it’s a bad idea to wait until thise iron reseves run out. Just because you could wait until 6 months doesn’t mean you should. #bestandworst

  23. March 16, 2017 / 6:49 am

    Good on you for speaking up. I just don’t get people who think it’s ok to publicly criticise someone for they way they choose to raise their children. Every child is different. My son was weaned at 5 months and was more than ready, my daughter showed signs of being ready till she had her first taste then she changed her mind and stopped ogling our food so we waited till 6 months. Guess which one is healthier and eats a more varied diet, the one who weaned early x
    #Bestandworst
    Alana – Burnished Chaos recently posted…10 Reasons Why I’m Rocking MotherhoodMy Profile

  24. March 16, 2017 / 7:43 pm

    I’ve started when my boy was 4 months and I don’t regret. It’s not a shame not everyone can breastfeed and it’s your baby you deciding what you want to do and when
    #bestandworst
    ohmummymia recently posted…Playpen is only for lazy parentsMy Profile

  25. March 17, 2017 / 7:10 am

    I completely understand this – the judgement others inflict is exhausting at times!!! It’s horrible. You know your baby better than ANYONE – always go with what you think is right. Great post xx #blogcrush

  26. March 18, 2017 / 4:54 pm

    Oh judgemental parents get right on my wick. Every child is different and what’s right for yours might not be right for another, but who the hell are they to even bring it up. Little Man was weaned at 5 months. He was hungry!! I wasn’t going to starve him! Good for you for following your gut instinct. You are Mum after all, and you know best. Always. #bestandworst
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  27. March 18, 2017 / 5:24 pm

    every child and every mother is different, making their breasfeeding journey different as well, this is something i have def learned with 5 kids, they are each different and i breastfed each differently and for different lengths of time because of it. judgement is so hard, i understand avoiding certain topics because of the fear of it! #bestandworst

  28. March 19, 2017 / 8:27 am

    I think you have to do what’s right for you – nevermind what anyone else thinks! #bestandworst
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