10 Reasons Why I Love You but I Want to Destroy You!

I love my gremlin tonnes. I look at her little face and her listen to her dirty laugh and I could actually eat her. There is that definite feeling; that insane love that you only get from having children. I honestly do count my blessings everyday BUT sometimes want to throw her out of the window.

Sometimes I want to destroy her. There I have said it. She drives me NUTS. Insane, crackers, bonkers, go outside and count to a million crazy. I’m working on my patience and ability to lose it in 60 seconds flat and I am much better but it can be flipping hard.

There are many reasons which I thought I would share. How many can you agree with?

  • She spits out lumps of food. Watching her spit out food like it is poison makes me twitch. Food I know she liked to eat 2 days ago.
  • She needs one of us to lie on the floor, on the landing, on the stairs…ANYWHERE. As long as she knows we are there so she can fall asleep.
  • She tells me she needs a poo or a wee and wants the potty right after I have just changed a dirty nappy. She doesn’t but we have to humor her for practice.
  • When she actually does need a poo (and I know) she runs off and “says Bye Mummy”. Point blank refusal to sit on the potty.
  • She changes her mind constantly. I put Peppa on. She wants Little Princess. She tells me she wants warm milk. I put it in the microwave and she immediately goes nuts screaming for cold. Make a DECISION child!
  • She pours water on the floor out of the bath so it then becomes a immediate game of how long until you slip and break a bone?
  • She is given choices; buggy or hold my hand and walk. She legs it. I sit on her to get into the buggy. She has a meltdown.
  • She does this face if she does something she shouldn’t. I tell her off and she casually goes off and does something else naughty like chuck her crayons everywhere or put one finger on an ornament and look at me. I KNOW she does this to do my head in.
  • If I tell her she can’t do something she already runs off and asks Daddy (luckily he is well trained and says no too).
  • She mills around the kitchen when I try to do jobs; she opens the fridge (seeking out chocolate), she empties drawers, grabs the broom, tries to climb her highchair. Every task I have to do – estimate a duration and double it. Move her into the lounge = meltdown.
Breathe Sarah, BREATHE!!!!