I’m all for having a Dr Google now and then whether it be a problem with me or my gremlin. I know it’s best to check the NHS website, blah blah and REALLY try to avoid forums. Despite this I have found myself looking at forums now and then to see other’s experiences.
One of the fab thing about the blogging community is the sense of community, especially the parenting circle. It’s fab that you can tweet a question, nosey on a social media group or probably find a blog post about the same issue that you are having! It’s reassuring and supportive.
However, how helpful is it?
Any readers know I have issues with the gremlin eating fruit and we did have a bit of a mare getting her to start her potty training. She wanted us to stay with her for ages until she slept for a while. She was waking at 5am for ages. For all of these issues or phases, I chatted to friends, googled, read some blogs. Of course there were relatable stories, tips and hints but did anything work? Anybody’s suggestions help? Absolutely not! We tried plying my daughter with water and bribing her with chocolate; she still refused the potty. We tried putting her to bed later; she still woke at 5am.
Fast forward to now; the gremlin sleeps better, she’s taken to the potty, she ate a satsuma today! She’s done well but when SHE was ready to do these things. No amount of me pushing or using other people’s strategies helped.
The word wide web in some respects is a dangerous and pressurising place for parents. It can have all the positive help and support but it can disguise judgement, expectation and comparison very easily. Potty trained 18 month olds, perfect sleepers and model eaters. Rare but they are there so why is your child not the same?
This seems kind of negative eh? Like there’s no point in sharing experiences or positive results. I don’t mean that. Reading successful potty training stories or ways of disguising fruit makes me feel positive so ultimately it helped in some way.
However, I kind of feel I need to chuck all the books out, ditch Google and just let my gremlin get on with it! Of course anything worryingly medical is different but phases are phases. They do pass. What I have learnt from the gremlin is she likes control and will reach milestones when she is ready, not when a book, a forum, or a blog post tells me.
Kids will do things at their pace. Let them be. We will all be happier.