Sometimes when I have a shit day with one of the kids, I do find it cathartic to blog. It was the main reason I started blogging…to write! It’s good to get my feelings down; my frustrations and just general meh!
I also think telling other people you have had a shit day, especially parents, can be helpful, as we all have them. Kids are feral. Kids are fickle. Kids change from one day to the next, so I know tomorrow is likely to be better (I’m hoping!)
I’m sat writing this with the little guy in bed next to me and white noise blasting out of my phone. He’s asleep but it feels like it had taken pretty. much all day to get there and it’s 5pm now.
My family are all at Zizzis in town having a Mother’s Day meal as the in-laws are over. I am not with them and it feels rough. Usually I’m one of those Mums who drags their kids out and about and doesn’t miss out but just not today. I haven’t had the energy. I’m cross. I’m sad that I’m missing the girls having a lovely meal. I miss them and missing a meal for the Mothers – me included.
The little guy has been exhausting today. Cried on and off all day when not feeding and dozing. I know he needed to sleep and when I say sleep, for more than 10 minutes. Yesterday he crashed for 3 hours and was a delight all day. That’s the joys of the end of the week. I have no kids, can let him sleep wherever and whenever he wants but today there is noise, interruptions and he has just not settled. There was no way I wanted to sit in a restaurant and pay for a meal with a tired, screaming baby. Enjoyment? I think not.
The little guy is only 5 weeks old. He’s only a newborn and he’s still very clingy; wanting that comfort from one of us. I know the gremlin was exactly the same but you forget those bad newborn days and seems to see the rosy, lovely days with them. I can’t always get him to sleep and I know he is the most miserable when he is tired.
It’s hard. It’s bloody hard. There is only so much crying I can take before I have to walk away. Go upstairs and hand him to my husband for a bit. It’s hard pushing your toddler away, as you have to pick up her brother for the millionth time, knowing full well you are going to struggle to comfort him without a feed again. You know full well your toddler climbs on you, the minute he screams to get a cuddle and avoid you picking him up.
I know today was a bad day. We all have them and with three kids, in the early, newborn days, it’s not always going to be a picnic.
Today I am thankful for the friends who popped in and gave me a few words of comfort. I’m thankful for Grandma doing crafts and giving me 5 minutes peace and thankful for hubby who looks after me so well.
Tomorrow is another day.
It’s Mother’s Day….best be on the good behaviour little Man!!!