Disclosure – this is a collaborative post.
Help. It’s such a simple word, and yet it’s loaded with so much meaning and baggage. It’s something that the vast majority of us probably need far more often than we admit. Let’s be totally honest; life isn’t always a picnic. In fact, it can be a total nightmare at times. So why is it that so many of us assume that we can handle everything that life throws at us all by ourselves? And if we can, is that really the best way to handle things? The answer to that is, of course, no. Trying to handle everything life can dish out all on your own is almost guaranteed to leave you feeling exhausted and burnt out. And that’s if you manage to hold your own at all. So why do we find it so hard to ask for help? And are there ways to solve that problem?
Help requires trust
Deep down, asking for help is about looking at someone else and telling them that you’re not doing okay. As simple as this might seem, this is one of the most intimate and difficult things that you could ever do. You’re exposing yourself to someone else in a way that leaves you very vulnerable. Perhaps there’s a fear that they will use this knowledge against you, rather than to support you. The important thing is to speak to people you trust. This can be someone you trust personally, or perhaps a professional who is well accredited. Whether you’re asking for help from a loved one because you need support in making a tough decision, or you need to find competent personal injury lawyers for hire because you’ve been in an accident, these things take trust. Giving out that trust is never easy, but it’s so important to learn how to do it if you’re going to get through life with the support you need.
We’re taught that it’s a sign of weakness
There’s this idea in a lot of modern society that it’s each person’s job to pull themselves up by their bootstraps. However, the truth is that doing that is often pretty much impossible. No one is ever truly “self-made” and putting that kind of pressure on yourself to be able to succeed in your life without ever asking for any help is just going to make you miserable. Anyone who says that they have never needed any help is either delusional or lying. Reaching out to others is an essential aspect of living a happy life. Never let anyone tell you that that’s a sign of weakness.
How do you ask for it?
The most important thing to do is to acknowledge that you need help in the first place. This means being honest with yourself before you can be honest with anyone else. If you’re trying to convince yourself that you’re doing fine without anyone else, then you’re never going to be able to put the right level of trust in anyone else in order to get the help you need. Then, when the time comes to ask for help, then you need to be completely honest. Whether it’s a family member, employer, or legal representative, no one can help you unless they know exactly what is wrong and exactly what it is that you need from them. Let them know what’s happening and why it is that you need help. Don’t hold anything back, if you do then you’re just showing that you don’t trust them enough to take on their full support. Of course, it’s important that you try not to be a burden on anyone else but as long as you’re aware of the impact that you’re having on other people that shouldn’t happen.
Asking for help is never easy, but it is far better than suffering in silence when you could be reaching out to other people and making the load that much lighter. Far too often people work under the assumption that the best thing that they can do is to just keep things to themselves. They act as though there’s some kind of virtue in being able to shoulder the burden of everything going on in their life without needing to ask anyone for help. But the reality is that human beings aren’t meant to be alone and we’re not meant to face up to these kinds of things without the support of others. There is no shame in asking for help. It’s one of the bravest things you can do.
Disclosure – this is a collaborative post.
