Judging other parents. Are you guilty of it? Are you guilty of making that snap judgment when you spot another parent’s behaviour, their child’s behaviour. Their food choices, discipline choices, clothes choices. Do you judge other parents?
I know I am guilty of it.
I was in Tesco at he beginning of the week playing with my phone as usual, and watched the lady ahead of me put jars and jars of baby food through the till. Not just a couple; possibly for eating out or to have a few in the cupboard in case of an emergency. A lot, enough to be feeding their baby all their meals from jars.
My initial thoughts to this? Not good and not any I am proud of.
I Did Judge Other Parents
Why on earth is she buying those awful things? Why not make lovely home made meals from scratch? I did. I’ve tasted those concoctions. They are vile.
Literally a split second later I was reprimanding myself. What had I just done? Judged and not very nicely. I’ve read so many blog posts, articles, memes and even written posts myself about the pressure and judgement when being a parent. Breast vs bottle. Co-sleep vs. cot. Baby wear or not? The list is endless. The camps are divided. The judgement and guilt can be overwhelming.
Yet I’m a guilty as anyone else. I made a snap judgement. I don’t know this lady or her circumstances.
That mum’s child may hate home cooked food.
They may be going on a holiday, needing to take pre-packed weaning food, just like I did 2 years ago.
She may be a mum who can’t be arsed to cook. She may have 5 others kids at school and just no time. So what? It’s her prerogative.
The thing is that thought sprung into my mind before I could even stop myself. Is that bad? Or is it ok as I kept my thoughts to myself? I know there will be people out there where that thought will have never entered their head. I’m jealous and wish I could shut down that self righteous side of my mind. It is just so hard! I was a breast feeder and have to admit when I hear people even adamant to try it, as find it disgusting, it niggles me.
Why? I’m passionate and it worked for us? I am too judgmental? I’m not sure.
I doesn’t make me feel very kind. Very supportive of other parents but it was a quick thought and I couldn’t help it!
What’s the point of this post really? To probably make sense of my thoughts and see what others do. I’m going to try to stop the snap thoughts that come into my mind. On the other side of the coin, perhaps the fear of being judged by others contributes to my mindset. Perhaps stopping caring what others think will help.
I’d never write about my thoughts or ever verbalise a judgement but I guess that’s not the point.
Not having that thought in the first place would be the biggest achievement
What about you? Do you judge other parents even if secretly?