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Losing My Baby Weight – Should I Feel Guilty?

Losing My Baby Weight – Should I Feel Guilty?

I’m now almost 5 months post-partum. This is scary enough in itself! I have an almost 5 month old baby boy, who rolled over the other day. Ah the fun begins! I wondered what my body would be like after my third baby during the pregnancy. Would I lose my baby weight this time around? Would it take a little longer this time due to having more children to look after and less time?

It has been slower this time I would say but I am pretty close to my pre-pregnancy weight and feeling confident in my denim shorts again. And I guess I should be proud of this but it seems the opposite.

I was at my daughter’s school sports day last week and one of the Mums I chat to came over and pointed to my stomach, exclaiming, “Look at you skinny minny!” I knew I looked like I had lost all my baby weight and I guess I pretty much have.

Honestly, I didn’t know what to say. How about: “Wow thanks, yes! I’m just so lucky. I have good genes. I didn’t get any stretch marks. I’ve been trying to eat well. I breastfeed. I’m lucky enough to have a husband who works from home, so I fit in home workouts and the gym.”

No, as all of that makes me look like a smug, annoying cow. No one likes a humble bragger do they really?

So what did I do? I kind of shiftily looked around and muttered, “oh I’ve been back to the gym.” I was like some ashamed child, who has been caught with their hand in the cookie jar. I felt embarrassed. I felt guilty. The conversation swiftly changed to her fitness goals and we moved on.


Why should I feel bad for what has happened to my body since having a baby?

I have seen an awful lot of body positivity posts all over social media recently. Loads of people are stripping off to their undies and showing off their bodies; loud and proud. Fighting back against the Insta-perfect bodies. However, I haven’t seen many slim people doing this; people who have bounced back after having a baby. I’m not saying no-one but not as many.

losing my baby weight

It seems frowned upon. I saw a while-back, a celeb put a picture of her body on Instagram a few days after birth and her stomach had reduced drastically. She trained during her pregnancy however and was followed probably for that reason and of course her image.

She got a lot of slamming for this.

It was unrealistic for many; promoting high expectations for women after giving birth. Yes, fair enough. It was. It is! I certainly took me almost 5 months to get to where I am now. A few days after giving birth to the little guy, I still had a bump. A good-sized bump too.

But even now, after 5 months, where my stomach has shrank and my abs are returning, I feel guilty.

People may say I’m not “realistic”. But it is my reality. It’s my normality. Yes some of this is genetics and just me but I have tried hard to eat well and train when I can.

My realism may not be the same as others and I should be proud of what I’ve managed this but it’s hard. I often feel if I posted a bikini shot when on my recent holidays on the old Insta grid, I would get slated for it, as it was not long since I had the little man. This maybe my insecurities bubbling over but I feel, it is what some would think.

All women are different.

All women have different priorities after having a baby. I’ve made it no secret I wanted to get back in shape after the little man. I love to workout and I love my food too, whether it be healthy food or not. I’m breastfeeding, busy with two little girls as well and the weight has just disappeared. I often think my body likes a specific weight and tries to gravitate back there most of the time.

Should I feel guilty for losing my baby weight? No but it’s a funny time to a Mum right now. You feel guilty for losing the weight and feeling confident and often guilty if you don’t!! Social media has a lot to answer for.

But we shouldn’t! Kids just see you, not a stretch mark, or a bit of extra flesh. They love you regardless and in those weary, first few months after you have had a baby, it’s all that matters.

baby weight



1 Comment

  1. July 12, 2019 / 7:55 am

    You absolutely shouldn’t feel guilty. You’ve worked hard to get back in shape and breastfeeding too which helps. There’s plenty of mums who aren’t fussed or motivated to getting back in to shape and that’s their choice. I’m the same as you and see no harm in getting back in the gym almost straightaway. It doesn’t make me a bad mum or selfish. I’m sure there was a hint of the green eyed monster in the comments you had!