Don’t you just love reminiscing on all the stupid things you have done as a kid? I think back and quite often have a giggle to myself. Ages ago I was nominated to do one of those chain blog posts about the 10 warnings I’d give my kid self, so I thought I would have a go.
So what would I tell my younger child self? Oh hindsight I wish you were real:
- Don’t wear pink eyeshadow and black mascara – after a while and a lot of eye rubbing later, it will look like you have been punched.
- Don’t go around to your crush’s house and declare your undying love for them. Rejection on the doorstep is pretty mortifying. The 45 minute walk home is even worse.
- Don’t slide down the stairs on a mattress with your brother. The carpet burns on elbows were not pretty and the nailing from your mum was the icing on the cake.
- Don’t eat chewing gum/french bread or bite into apples when wearing train track braces. Having to go back to the dentist to get the brackets re-attached and a lecture wasn’t fun.
- Don’t have too much to drink on the celebratory chinese meal when you got your AS results and then shout really loudly at your best friend that she got an “E for Elephant” in maths. She will NOT be happy with you. (God I was an idiot).
- Do wear the right trainers for netball practice. My badminton ones were not the best and falling flat on my arse in front of everyone was the highlight of my year.
- Don’t ever stuff your bra with tissue. It’s sucked being flat-chested but crumpled tits look even worse.
- Don’t wear sports gear unless doing sport. It is just NOT cool. I have no idea why it came into fashion when I was in high school and I was so desperate for some Adidas joggers. It’s shapeless and just plain WRONG.
- Don’t eat too much at sleepovers. I was always such a pig. Could quite easily eat a whole box of chocolate fingers and I would always feel sick and spend the rest of the night in the loo trying not to vom.
- Don’t have your first kiss at 13 for a dare. You may have had to wait a bit longer but it would have been much more meaningful if you were actually dating the person you snogged!